sweet baby times

I'm convinced that no matter how much babies change so quickly, there are somethings that will stay exactly the same. Those deep eyes staring up at you, that sweet little round nose. Nursing Abbott has been such a blessing. The quality time I get to spend with him is awesome. It allows for ample staring time. I feel like I know every single little detail of his precious little face.

 Last night at around 3:26 in the morning (yikes!) I was reminded of what a privilege it is to be him mommy and to be able to take on all the feeding responsibility. It has been a bonding experience unlike any other. Laurelei was not able to BF exclusively because of her anemia, so this has been a whole new experience for me. At first I felt a lot like other new mom's I am sure. It was a little lonely. I was up in the middle of the night all by myself, so tired, so sleep deprived. I felt like I was tied to a chair the first couple of days, feeding non stop. That has all changed though. We are still on a 3 hour feeding schedule, but it doesn't seem lonely or limiting at all. We have learned to adjust our feeding times to fit our schedule for going out and being active. We have cut down our feedings to just one in the middle of the night (fingers crossed!) I am actually starting to think that I might be sad when that one goes away now. The middle of the night feeding time is our favorite.

Sweet Abbott has started to respond to things he likes with a smile. Every night now at some point I begin to hear the familiar sounds of a baby stirring. I get him quickly so as not to wake Matt and L. We snuggle into the recliner and Abbott begins to eat. And now, every night, about 2 minutes into our late night feeding he stops, looks up at me and smiles one big smile. It makes this mommy's heart melt and I instantaneously forget that I was so tired. I think it's Abbott's little way of telling me he appreciates me and he's happy to be awake in my arms, even if just for a few minutes. (It could also be him preparing me for the ten minutes after I change his diaper where he is wide awake and talking up a storm, daring me to be frustrated at his sweet grins and coos! Just like big sister this little schmoozer is!)

I know that going to back to work is going to be hard. We've been down that road before. I think giving up the day time feedings and snuggle sessions is going to be killer. However, I also know that somewhere in the middle of the night I will probably still be reminded of these sweet little mommy/baby times, as he doesn't seem to be anywhere close to giving up that feeding, which is okay with me! (And maybe, just maybe, I am writing that down so I always remember those words came out of my mouth when I go back to work! :)