Dear Abbott on my lap...

You probably won't remember this, but we are sitting here on the beach, and you are asleep on my lap. For a long time I sat just memorizing everything about you at this very moment. The way your hair smells of a mixture of baby shampoo, sunscreen, and salt water. All of the little scars on your face, the way you are wearing your favorite hat. How you sat up wide awake from a dead sleep just to retrieve your bucket, worried you were missing out on play time, only to grab the bucket tight and fall immediately back to sleep. 

This vacation has been close to perfect. You and your sister are having so much fun! And while I've loved every second of it,  I can't help but admit that it is a little terrifying too. 

Have you ever heard that sappy country song, 'You're gonna miss this?' Well I have, and I'm terrified that its true. These times are so sweet and precious. Your chubby little cheeks and sandy feet. The way you run around in circles until your dizzy and then fall down on the floor, the result of which was most of your scars. If I could just freeze you and Laurelei right where you are, raising the eternal toddler forever I would do it.

But I can't, and I'm left here holding your realizing that you will grow and explore and have a family of your own someday. You'll hold your own children and watch them grow, just like I am holding you. I guess all I can do is soak up every moment of this sleeping baby you are right now. Take lots of pictures and write down lots of memories. All the while, praying you become a wonderful man, just like your daddy. And somehow, hoping we figure out how to do this whole parenting thing right along the way.

Love you to the moon and back little one.

Xo,

Mommy

 

Abbott at&around 18 months

It's been too long since I have updated on my sweet little Abbott. He is incredible. All boy. Messy, playful, giggly, cuddly, smiley, sometimes whiny, and quite simply the sweetest. I can't even begin to explain what a blessing he is to our family. It's hard to believe that just two years ago I was writing this post, fretting over his little life. Now all I see is a healthy, happy baby boy. God is so good.

The first thing you should know about Abbott is that he is always, I mean always, hungry. Matt and I sort of refer to him like a gas tank. You have to fill him all the way up to get the best performance. When he wakes up in the morning he is one grumpy boy. We have developed a pretty successful morning routine though of putting him immediately on the couch and providing some kind of breakfast before we attempt to talk to him. This usually gives us all the best results.

 He is a bit of a stinker too. This is one of my favorite faces of his. Usually I get this face when he has been asked not to do something, and he is going to do it anyway, or if he has been caught in the act. It's like his own little way of saying, "who, me?" But really, how can you not give into that sweet smile? I am still working on that myself.

Abbott is a cuddly little mommy's boy. Laurelei was all go, go, go from the time she could walk. It took a few years for her to get back into a cuddly spirit. Abbott has never let it go. He'll be playing and suddenly stop, run over to give me hugs and kisses, and return to his activity. He can't go to bed without being held and rocked. It's so sweet, and I don't hate it all!

He is also quite the little dancer. Abbott has a dance that goes with Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and Itsy Bitsy Spider. If he hears music is is all over. I am sure he will wish he had better rhythm as he gets older, but I am totally okay with it, because it is the cutest.

This little boy is so much fun. Matt and I always wondered how it would be different to have a little boy after our three years with just Laurelei.  I love the dance and bows and ruffles and pure sweetness that comes with Laurelei. I just never imagined it could be so perfect to have one of each.

Love you little Abby Rabbit.

Happy Birthday Abbott

It is hard to believe that one year ago you were born.

I used to think it would be impossible to love someone as much and in the same way as I love your sister Laurelei. I couldn't possibly split my heart in two that way.

Then you were born. I realized that I didn't have to split my heart in two, it just doubled in size.

I knew from the moment you started kicking in my belly that we would have something special. We went through a lot together, and I always knew you'd be my baby boy.

Today you turn one. You are growing up and becoming more and more of a little boy each day. Those round baby feet and short chubby legs are disappearing.

You've graduated from that cute little 'pirate smile.'

You're 13lbs heavier and so much more mobile.

But still, you are perfect.
You are mine.
You are our sweet little Abby Rabbit.

And we wish you the happiest birthday a boy can have.

All my love,
Mommy

11 whole months...

I may be a week late, but here we are. Abbott is officially 11 months (and one week) old! I cannot believe we are going on a year already! This time last year I was officially off of work again and back on bedrest. If my memory is correct, I was going into the hospital this very day with preterm labor. Getting steroids to develop baby's lungs and being dosed with the TERRIBLE magnesium sulfate to stop those persistent contractions. We held Abbott off for almost 4 more weeks, with 2 trips to the hospital in between!

Here are some special things about our little one this month...

growing...Abbott is 18lbs 5oz already! I can hardly believe how big he seems. He is getting taller and thinning out a little in the middle I think. He legs don't seem to have quite as much baby 'chunk' as they used to, and I miss them. We are still wearing 6 and 9 month clothes for the time being, although he has fit into at least one pair of 12 month jammies too! His hair is growing too! It is starting to curl at the ends in the sweetest way.

eating...We have almost officially stopped baby food. He is still eating some during the day at school, but he eats what we eat here at home in a sort of smooshed version. :) Spaghetti with turkey meatballs is his favorite!

cruising... He is all over the place, taking one, two, and even three steps at a time! I really think he would just take off if he realized he could. Abbott stands all the time alone, and takes a few steps before he realizes he isn't holding onto anything, and then immediately falls to his bottom. He is so close it scares me!

babbling... For some reason we are stuck on a constant, "da, da, da, da..." I've heard a 'ba' or even a 'ga' here or there. Certainly no 'ma' or better yet, 'mama.' I am confident that 'mommy' will be he first real word with meaning though, seeing as how I am his favorite. :)

playing...Abbott plays so much these days, it is so much fun! Him and L laugh and giggle all the time. They play side by side a lot. Abbott is quite the little destruct-or though, in true boy fashion I guess. L will be playing quietly with her dolls and he'll grab them by the hair and drag them down the hall. This always incites a sort of miniature baby riot. L is screaming while trying to save her dolls and Abbott is screaming back at her as she tries to pry his hands open. It's kind of cute in a funny, piercing headache kind of way... His favorite playtime is for sure in the bath. Abbott is a total water baby, loves to splash and dunk his head in too!

cuddling...Abbott, my favorite time with you is cuddle time. You are such a sweetheart. Crawling over to me to give hugs and kisses. You lay your head on my shoulder in just the perfect way. You rest there for a while, just looking around and taking it all in. Sometimes you fall asleep, but mostly you just rub my arm and hang out. Sometimes when I am feeding you before bed you just look up and laugh. We laugh together for a while before you rub your sleepy little eyes and I put you to bed. Those are the sweetest times, and times I know you'll grow out of before I am ready to let them go!

Happy 11 months baby! If it is okay with you, I am going to pretend that you are my tiny little baby for just a few weeks longer. Love you to the moon and back little abby rabbit.

9 whole months...

It's official. Abbott Matthew is officially 3/4 of the way through his first year of life. We are closing in on one year and I can't quite wrap my mind around it!

Here are some special things about our little Abby Rabbit this month...

moving... this was as close as we got to a 9 month picture. I couldn't sit him down and get to the camera fast enough to catch him before he moved. He is all momma's boy, and if I am sitting in front of him, he is sitting in my lap. I'm not going to pretend I don't love it! We crawl properly at turbo speed now. Abbott can get to the carbon monoxide detector as quick as a flash! He LOVES to push the button and light the house up with a crazy loud, "BEEEP!" It always causes crying, on his and L's part, so I can't imagine why he keeps doing it over and over again. It's not like we don't watch our kid or anything, I promise. That doesn't mean that he hasn't gotten the occasional swipe at the new puppy's food though. I think I officially won parent of the year award when he ate it twice, in one day. Oops.

growing... Abbott is 17.5lbs and 26.75 inches long! Growing like a weed. He's still hanging in the 10-25th percentile range though, minus the head. He has a big noggin, but that's okay!

standing... We are still pulling up and standing on just about anything now. It's freaking me out a little bit. He loves to do it, but mostly lacks in proficiency. Guess he's just all boy with all those bumps and bruises!

playing...We get to play lots of games and have lots of fun now! He loves kissing baby in the mirror, peekaboo, dropping things from his high chair. He would spend hours a day in L's room playing with her kitchen set if we'd let him! He a big fan of banging on things that produce a sound. One of our favorite times of the day is dinner time. L and Abbott usually enter into some sort of silly giggling match. One making the other laugh over and over again. They both love it, and it warms our hearts to hear! We've also introduced a few new toys this month that Abbott is enjoying, one of which is a walking toy. He is getting pretty good at it, which is a little scary! I wonder if next month's post will include first steps? I shudder to think!

teething...Matt and I have been convinced that Abbott has been teething since about 4 months. Well, we finally learned this month what teething is actually all about. Yikes! I pretty much spend every day covered in drool. Abbott fusses a lot more than usual, which makes me sad. All in all, it hasn't been too bad, and we have a tiny little front tooth to show for it! He's already working on tooth #1's neighbor too, which should make for a fun little beach vacation!

sleeping... We.don't.sleep. Ugh. I'm not going to blame him though, since it's mostly ear infection induced. Abbott spent his entire month with an ear infection. It has taken 6 weeks and 3 progressively stronger antibiotics to get rid of it. It's been a pretty heart breaking few weeks around here with our little guy! I'm a little scared that we are well on our way to tubes.

Look at that sweet little tongue. We've seen a lot of that too. Makes me think he's working really hard to complete a task. Love it!

Happy 9 months little Abbott. Love you bunches.

three whole months...

My little Abbott is three whole months today. Three WHOLE months! How quickly time is passing. Abbott is such a joy every single day!

Here are some special things about our three month old little baby boy...

 

growing... I have a feeling Abbott is close to 12lbs now. He is coming to a close on his size one diapers, but I am trying to put it off as long as I possible can! He is starting to bust out of some of his 0-3months clothes as well. How is that happening?

new things...Abbott is still smiling all the time, but his coos are starting to escalate to close to a giggle! I cannot wait to figure out what makes him giggle for the first time. We have started sleeping through the night almost regularly, 10-6, mommy loves it! Abbott has also started to find his thumb, fingers, mostly his entire hand. He can be heard slurping in the backseat most of the time if he is awake. It's pretty hilarious. He doesn't seem to want to unroll those fists anytime soon though. His little fists are always clenched fairly tight. 

We still think we have about the happiest baby on the block. He smiles non stop and those precious smiles are oh so contagious. We love this sweet baby boy! Happy three months abby rabbit, you are really one of the two best gifts we've ever received.

one whole month...

Abbott was one whole month old yesterday! As much as it pains me to know that time has passed that quickly, I am so happy to have had my happy, healthy boy here for a whole month now. He sure does brighten our days!

Here are some of the things baby Abbott is up to at 1 month...

growing... Born 6lbs 10oz, 19.5inches long/ NOW 8lbs, 20.25 inches long!! We are still wearing newborn sleepers and diapers (though we could probably move up to 1's soon, mommy just can't let go of the newborn stage yet!)

eating... He'd eat all the time if we'd let him. The second anything touches his lips he thinks he is hungry. This includes paci's, blankets when he is swaddled, too big sleepers, etc. We're still eating every three hours pretty much religiously. At night we might squeeze in 4 if we are lucky. :)

sleeping/ schedules...The most I am doing in the way of 'scheduling' my baby is the whole eat, play, sleep philosophy. I guess it comes from babywise, but that is really the only aspect I've taken from that book. Abbott is spending a lot more time awake now, so we don't have to jump through hoops anymore getting those precious little eyes open! I love how after 45 minutes/ 1 hour into 'playtime' he really starts to stress himself out with his arms and legs. We are still all jerky movements around here, and he just can't handle the freedom! Once he starts kicking and getting frustrated, we swaddle him tightly and he is asleep in minutes. We haven't established 'bedtime' yet, but generally after your 9ish feeding there is no more wake time until around 8 the next morning, except for eating of course!

likes/ dislikes... Well he definitely doesn't like the nasal aspirator, we've learned that much!! Really though, Abbott is a special little baby who fortunately doesn't have many dislikes at all. He still rarely cries about anything other than personal discomfort, hunger. When he does it's still the 'warning cries,' he'll cry out, wait for us to respond, and cry out again if we don't! (People were right, the second is a little easier! :) I guess I could say he still doesn't like his paci very much. He does LOVE a few things though. He loves his bath, staring at the lights in the room, being swaddled tightly to sleep, laying on his play mat in front of a heater. He also loves to cuddle on mommy's shoulder or lay on his belly for napping. (Don't worry, always under supervision!) And I have to say, he loves taking a bottle from daddy too, he always eats like a champ!

firsts... This month we had our first bath (of course), first outing (the doctor's), first cold :(, and first bottle. I can't wait to see what firsts come next month too!

We love you little Abbott!

Baby Abbott, your Birth Story

Dear Abbott,

You surprised us all by coming at 36 weeks. Not that we weren't expecting you to be early, we just had no idea when you would actually come! You had put mommy on bed rest for close to 14 weeks and for the most part we were expecting you to come at any point throughout the whole thing. I sometimes don't think I will ever be able to forget all of the details surrounding your entrance into the world, just like I felt with your big sister Laurelei. Everything about you and that day was perfect in every single way.

 I went into the doctor on September 19th, just like I had every week for the past few weeks. They hooked me up to the monitor and started watching your heart rate and my contractions. It was no surprise to anyone that I was having contractions still around 5 minutes apart. Most of them didn't hurt to bad, but they were strong and steady as they had been for the past few weeks. As always, you were such a champ. Your heart beat was strong and steady. I was sure the doctor would just send us home to wait patiently for another week. Dr. Slone came in to check on us and was surprised when I was making a little more progress than she had hoped, as I was already 3+ centimeters along. That news, plus a few returning symptoms of the abruption was enough to send you and me back over to the hospital for the 3rd time this month! The only difference was, Dr. Slone said I wouldn't get to leave this time without a baby! I immediately texted daddy and Gigi and we all got very excited. You would be here in 24 hours, we just couldn't believe it!

When we got to the hospital we only had a tentative plan of action. Dr. Slone was very careful throughout the whole pregnancy not to make any big decisions to quickly. She told me we would watch you and my contractions over night, beginning to help me along with some pitocin at 1:00am if I needed it. Well, you were determined to come because I kept making progress on my own and it scared her enough to wait to give me any help until the morning. Dr. Slone really wanted to be there for you and me when you were born, and I am glad she made the decisions that she did! She came back to see up at 8:30 on Tuesday morning, the 20th. It was then that my water broke and within seconds the contractions were less than a minute apart! Daddy didn't even have time to brush his teeth until the wonderful anesthesiologist came in at 10:30 to save us all! We were already up to 7 centimeters and if she hadn't been on time, I think I might have missed the epidural. I don't think any of us would have enjoyed that too terribly much. By 11:00am I was already up to 9cm and had to text your daddy who was still in the waiting room to hurry back, because we were going to have a baby very, very soon! Around 11:30 we were 9.5 and Dr. Slone was back to bring you into the world. I was so anxious and excited and beyond ready to meet you! I loved you so much already and I hadn't even seen you yet. I knew you would be perfect.

Things started to get a little scary after that. You weren't handling all the stress and swiftness of the labor so well. Around 11:00 you had started to go into distress and your heart rate dropped. By the time we were ready to deliver Dr. Slone decided it was better to take us to the OR for a C-section, but you mister were having none of that. You forced her to change her mind again when she realized we were out of time and at that very minute we had to bring you into the world. Your daddy held my hand, the nurses talked me through it, and Dr. Slone did what she had to do to make sure you came that very minute at 11:53am. The few seconds your cord was wrapped around your neck were the longest seconds of my life. I watched you and prayed for you to cry and take your first breath. When you cried out to us for the first time my heart jumped for joy. Daddy and I were over the moon.

You surprised us all again by weighing in at a healthy 6lbs 10oz! We are so thankful for Dr. Slone, who went above and beyond to bring both you and Laurelei into the world safely. She watched over you like a hawk from day one and took such good care of us. I am not sure that with anyone else in the delivery room we would have had the same outcome. I just know God put her in all of our lives.

Mommy was able to hold you for a few minutes before they whisked you away. Being early meant you had a few things they needed to check out. You had some fluid in your lungs and trouble breathing. My heart sank in the recovery room as you and daddy spent time in the nursery without me. I wanted to see you so very badly!

 You weren't able to come back to us that night until around 6:30pm. We were so excited when they wheeled you in! Daddy and I had everyone leave the room for a little while so we could have you all to ourselves. I fed you and cuddled you and everything seemed right in the world. You still whine, wheeze and grunt when you breathe right now, but we know that in time it will all work itself out. Just like your sister you are still perfect in every way.

You had many visitors that day who mostly had to see you through the nursery window. Gigi and Poppy, Grandma and Grandpa, Aunt Dana, Papaw and Ginger, Uncle Harry and Jackson, Aunt Kathy, Mamaw and PaPaw, Jess and Jarod, and of course your big sister Laurelei! I am probably forgetting someone as you were so well loved even before you were born!

I hope that as you grow you never forget how much we love you. As much as we loved you the day you were born we will love you more and more every single day of your life. Daddy and I are so blessed to have you and Laurelei. Our family is complete. I am forever grateful.

Love,
Mommy

Blessed

 

I've been meaning to write this post for a few days now, but honestly searched over and over again in my mind for just the right words. Maybe it is hormones or just the enormity of the blessing we have been given, but I have been overwhelmed with emotion lately for our new addition. Most of you probably remember my post back in June when we discovered a problem with our little one. Since that day I, along with many friends, family and many of you, have been praying constantly and earnestly for Abbott. After 36 weeks, 21 doctors appointments, 14 ultrasounds, 3 hospital stays in 4 different rooms and countless prayers, we finally welcomed baby Abbott into the world. The reality of how God has provided for us overwhelms me. He is perfect in every way.

I remember this worship song from a few years ago by Matt Redman, 'Blessed be Your Name.'

Blessed be Your name in the land that is plentiful,
Where Your streams of abundance flow,
Blessed be Your name.

Blessed be Your name,
When I'm found in the desert place,
Though I walk through the wilderness,
Blessed be Your name.

Every blessing You pour out on, turn back to praise.
And, when the darkness closes in, Lord, still I will say,

Blessed be the name of the Lord,
Blessed be Your name.
Blessed be the name of the Lord,
Blessed be Your glorious name.

Blessed be Your name,
When the suns shining down on me,
When the world's all as it should be,
Blessed be Your name.

Blessed be Your name,
On the road marked with suffering,
Lord, there's pain in the offering,
Blessed be Your name.

Every blessing You pour out on, turn back to praise.
When the darkness closes in, Lord, still I will say,

Blessed be the name of the Lord,
Blessed be Your name.
Blessed be the name of the Lord, 

Blessed be Your glorious name.

 

Throughout this pregnancy I kept this song in my heart, unable to share this prayer/ praise with anyone. I think I was secretly scared early on that we could lose this baby I had already named and loved and didn't want to admit that fear to anyone. Still, I so desperately wanted to thank God for the gift of this pregnancy, in the good and bad. There were definite high and low days, many tears, and plenty of petitions. I feel blessed beyond measure for what we have been given, a second beautiful miracle baby.

He's here!

 Abbott Matthew Burlew

September 20, 2011/ 11:53am

6lbs, 10oz- 19.5inches

Abbott Matthew Burlew made his debut Tuesday morning at 36 weeks. We are overjoyed to have our sweet little one with us! There are so any details I simply cannot wait to share, from the story of his birth to the way Laurelei loves her little brother, but for now I am just soaking up every little second of cuddling I can. I am sure I will be back soon with a little more energy and a story or two.

Tomorrow is the big day!

I am over the moon people! Tomorrow we will finally get to meet little Abbott and figure out once and for all how he is doing! I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I am for all of the attention to be off my body and well being and be solely on his. I am ready to welcome him and face whatever it is that delivery brings, although I feel so certain it will bring a 100% healthy baby this go around. While I am making a little progress on my own, I've been told they will intervene around 1am to help us along if we need it. Say a little prayer if you think about it!

 I can't quite figure out how big I think he is going to be. He was right on track growth size at our last ultrasound, but that was a couple of weeks ago.  That would make him right around 6 lbs now. Comparing him to L throws me for a loop though, as she was born around 38 weeks and was still only 5lb 14oz. Maybe he will surprise us all and be bigger than expected! Who knows? All I know is that I am praying I get to hold him right away and feel for myself, no waiting this time.  :)

{The last belly pic, whew!}

When I got L ready for school this morning I had mixed emotions. I had a feeling that this morning was different, though I didn't know we'd be going into the hospital today. I hugged her a little more, gave her lots of kisses.

 I even packed a bag for her before I left for my doctors appointment, just in case. As I wait for her to come visit me in the hospital right now my throat is a little tight. I love that little girl so much and am going to miss her like crazy this week. Her life is about to change in such a drastic way and there is no way for any of us to really prepare for it now.

 My prayer for her is that having another family member in the house only makes her feel more love. I can't wait for her to meet Abbott tomorrow. I kind of feel like she has spent 36 weeks thinking I am crazy when I talk about having a baby in my belly, I wonder what she will really do when she sees the real baby in my arms.

Goodness I wish I had just one more night at home with her, though I am pretty sure that no matter when this happened I feel that exact same way!

Guess I will be back sometime soon with an update on our newest little one. My heart is so full tonight!

Baby Abbott's Nursery!

I finally get to share what we've been up to in the 'little' room in our house. I don't have a lot to say about it, mostly because I used up all my energy writing the post for Lemon Tree Creations about it, so I'll just leave you with my favorite pictures. You can see ALL of the details over on LTC today here. Hope you will check it out!

 

 

This is unofficially 'officially' the final product. It still feels a little empty, but even just adding the little shower gifts we got the other day has made it feel a little more warm and inviting. I think I'm just waiting for it to actually be lived in, and then I am sure it will feel completely finished :).

{What I'm Loving Wednesday}

I am linking up again today with WILW!

one. I am LOVING my birthday week :). My husband got me out of the house Sunday to go see Harry Potter and it was well worth the fatigue it caused the rest of the day. (Not loving that HP is over!)

two. Loving that I got to spend an entire day with this one yesterday. I am missing our sweet summer alone time lately, so it was just what the doctor ordered!

 

three. I am loving the new Kate Spade diaper bag Matt got me for my birthday! Can we say stylish? Now I just need sweet baby things to go inside. He is the best!

four. So in love with waking up next to these two reading stories in bed this morning. (Although they seem to not be so in love with me taking a picture of their special moment first thing!)

 

five.  Loving the new camera lens my mom and step dad got me for my birthday! It's going to take some practice, but I can't wait to use this...

 to take even better pictures than this first attempt...

 

six.  Finally, I am loving having finished the baby's nursery art, (you can find it here at our Lemon Tree Blog today) meaning I am one step closer to being done with Abbott's nursery! yay!

Can't wait to see what you are loving too! Happy Wednesday!